In about 20 minutes I’ll be sweating profusely and hoping my heart does not give out. Some rain is forecast, that may dampen over heating. The summit isn’t in cloud yet, lessening the chance of stepping off some hidden ledge into an endless void.
Mountain rescue were out earlier, visible far below in their bright orange jackets. Our flare might still be just about visible, I’m comforted by that thought.
I left my glasses at home. Heavy rain would fog them up. Not having contact lenses blurs everything a fraction, making every step more exciting. Soon the violent wind gusts turn rain drops into little spears, hammering my face and hood. “It’s good to be alive”, shouts my climbing partner.
Despite endless church attendance for primary school admission, true religion resides here on holiday. “Dear God. I’ve chosen badly and admit my flaws. Please let me see my kids again. Hear my prayer”.
This is my holiday, how I reward myself for a term of hard desk work. No sitting by a beach, rather a hardening of the heart tissue. I could be warming myself in Marbella, sipping margaritas, instead I’m trying not to slip down a mucky scree slope.
Somewhere between fear and exhaustion, I start reflecting on how I got here.
Impressionable youth fall in with the wrong crowd all the time, I somehow managed to do that in middle age. I blame my wife. Having taken a dislike to my growing waistline and middle age paunch, one day she sent me down the local climbing gym. That was the gateway moment.
“You do celebrate and have some drinks afterward the climb, right Frank?”
Sadly no, the wrong-uns are anti-alcohol, anti-social, anti-losing control. They are the guys doing push ups in the gravel carpark, not to show off, but to eke out every last bit of human performance.
After the arduous 2 mile walk back to the car, it’s home to stretch out, do reps on the hang board, and crib up on rope handling technique. As prudent as that might be, I crack open a Fanta Orange and watch Michael McIntyre instead. The same as other normal, middle aged men.
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